Feeling of shame and feeling of guilt:

This kind of feeling is very personal and lies within the conscience of the addict. He cannot face the world with confidence because of this feeling. The addict feels and considers himself a bad person for being a porn addict. Feeling of guilt, on the other hand, is actually good for a porn addict because this generally pushes the person to take remedial action. However, merely a feeling of guilt cannot save the addict. He has to realize the negative effects of his addiction and direct his attention to reform his life.

If we compare guilt and shame, we can conclude that shame is problematic while guilt can be used as a tool to correct actions. Shame makes a sex or porn addict to have low regard for himself ashe loses his self-esteem. As a consequence,he turns inward in order to be able to avoid people and the society. Guilt can play as an important tool for an addict and give him the power to distinguish right from wrong and vice versa. These feelings can give the addictreasons to quit porn.

How does a sex or porn addict feel when still under the addiction?

• Any person who is struggling with porn addiction should first of all have the best reasons to quit porn. The porn addict struggles with his relationship with others and find it hard to fight and control his behavior. If he is not able to control his behavior, he might be like sex addicts who become more visually demonstrative in their sexual action and performance.

• The addict is also very fearful of being discovered and because of shame and guilt the addict goes deeper into his porn addiction. This is his way of dealing with his emotions. Some consider this as a sort of defense mechanism.

• They may also put the blame on others especially if they want to camouflage their shame and guilt. They suffer from crab mentality where they want to go up only to bring down those on top. This is because they want to look good before the people and this is the way of hiding their vices.

• To add to his defense mechanism the addict strives to attain a false image so that he would be regarded as better than the others. This is actually one of ways used by the addict to rebuild his dwindling self-esteem.

Surviving the porn fatality

It is certainly not easy to give up any addiction. But it is not impossible. If an addict is true in his desire to leave the addiction, he can certainly achieve his goals. Therapies are the most common remedies that can help in getting rid of past addiction. Therapy can be of two kinds – individual or group therapy. The addict may receive individual therapy on a one to one basis. On the other hand, the addict can get a chance to remedy his problem with a support group when he opts for group therapy

Other than personal and group therapy, the addict can also take help from the materials available on the internet. However, it is better to get support from an expert in this regard. Talking to someone who can understand a person’s feeling has natural healing powers. This someone can be one of the family members, friends or loved ones of the addict. And of course, it is also best to talk to a professional counselor who is an expert and a better person to guide an addict.

The addict will be able to open up and tell everything without inhibitions when he is with an expert of the field. The addict can even choose to discuss his experiences with other reforming or reformed porn addicts as they will be in a good position to guide someone who wants to follow their footsteps.Since they understand the feeling of guilt and shame of the other addict, they can talk to the person about emotions and challenges in living a straight and clean life.

It is seldom easy for a porn addict to leave his or her addiction without support. With good support and encouragement, the addict may find it less cumbersome to get off the clasp of pornography. They can survive the fatal porn addiction by being firm in their desire to get rid of the porn addiction. This is how they can emerge hero in this difficult ordeal.

What happens when you are addicted to pornography? We can start with the waste of money. These materials can cost you big bucks as these materials often have high prices. You will also be spending a lot of time in watching the porn materials. This will take away quality time from your family and work. You can lose your job because of this. And the harmony in the family can be jeopardized. Lastly, porn addiction will put your relationship on the rocksif you have a spouse or partner. Do you think you can still enjoy sex with your spouse without the aid of porn materials?

Being in this situation, your primary goal should be to break porn addiction. How do you do it?I can prescribe four fundamental ways to quit porn addiction. First and foremost, you should examine what made you addicted. This process starts with acceptance – an acknowledgement of your porn addiction. Your admission will be the starting point and this will lead you down the winding path to quit porn. You will now be ready to find what made you addicted to this dangerous activity.

Discovering the triggers to your addiction is also of vital importance. You should try to find out why you began watching porn in the first place. Does the impulse occur during specific times or just after certain happenings or events? Perhaps you do it before going to bed to get away with your insomnia. Perhaps you do it when you are bored and have nothing to do. It could also be because of loneliness in your life. Unless you know the triggers, you will have a hard time controlling your porn addiction.

Now, what you have to do is make note ofall the triggers and events. You have to make an entry about how you got addicted to porn and what are your specific triggers to this addiction. Include in your notes what happens each time you have watched porn – your feelings and your actuations. This will make you develop self-awareness which can be crucial in your desire to quit porn addiction.

For your next step, you should be able to condition your mind. Try to convince yourself that this is a bad habit and needs to be stamped out of your life. Like other forms of addiction, it might prove to be harder to quit than it seems. You might find that it becomes impossible to just stop. You will have desires and one can’t always fight the cravings. Perhaps one step that you should implement is weaning your hardcore porn desire.

Weaning can start by engaging in softcore. Softcore means that you have to reduce your time of watching porn material. Like in cigarette smoking, quitting can start from smoking lesser and lesser each day. So here, the objective is to decrease the time as well as the intensity of watching porn. By switching to softcore porn, you are nearing your objective of quitting porn.

You can also stimulate your mind by using some other ways. For instance, instead of watching the porn materials, you can resort to reading erotic stories. This will be quite a tricky move to pull off but this natural way is doable and can be effective. However, do not make it too hard on yourself and do not give up when you stumble along the way. It is best to document each success.

Lastly, establish a feasible goal. You will read from other resources that you are supposed to be busy to counter the call of addiction. You can keep yourself busy by getting involved in healthy habits. You can devout your time in playing musical instrument, doing crafts, getting into a weight loss regimen or joining different organizations or association. Go out with your family and spend more time with them. All this will have a great effect on your state of mind.

There you have it, the four fundamental ways of getting away from your pornography addiction. The road to success will not be easy but you should have willpower to fight the devil inside you. All that is needed from your side is the desire to break these shackles and free yourself from this abomination. I am sure you can do it. Best of luck!

The consequences of sex addiction are no different from the effects of drug, tobacco and alcohol addictions. In fact, the effects of sexual addiction can be very severe and painful. The absence of people willing to talk about sex addiction makes this a social problem. The internet is now the major source of porn materials. And the addicts multiply in number because they do can now watch and see these materials on laptops, computers and even Smartphones and tablets. Because of technology, more and more people became vulnerable to porn addiction. The painful fact is that young addicts suffer the most because of this kind of problem.

Evaluation of the person with porn addiction:

A sex addict can take help from professionals who are there to help them. The professionals will first evaluate the state of the person and find out about the extent of damage done by the sex addiction. However, addict or the people around him have to take initiative to take the person to some professional.

It is often easy for friends and family of the addict to pinpoint the sex addict. If the people around the sex addict look at the behavior of the addict closely, they will know that something is wrong with the person. The general symptoms of sex addiction that can be found in an addict are:

• Sex addicts tend to withdraw from relationships. This is because this addiction brings in damage to relationships. Sex addicts find ways to make time for their vice. There are times when they feel agitated if they cannot get access to their illicit materials. They may drift away from the people around them and this ruins their relationships.
• Sex addicts tend to live in disguise. They keep their addiction as secretly as possible, thus they try to balance their lives into something that is like normal.They will pretend to be like other. They often live a double life.
• Sex addicts have strong desires to play with sex toys and materials. They may have the desire to quit the vice but the compulsive behavior is too hard for them in most cases.

Addicts often find it hard to control their impulses. These people enjoy the short-term benefits of their activities and seldom consider the long-term repercussions of the addiction. The addicts are aware that they are doing the wrong thing yet they have to go on because of the compulsive behavior.

Diagnosis as a preparation to sex addiction counseling:

Diagnosis is the key for the cure of a sex addict. Proper diagnosis has to be made since the symptoms of sex addiction can be similar to symptoms of other behavioral problems. Bi-polarity also manifests in some of the symptoms of sex addicts. Because sex addition has to be properly established, there is a dire need to fix the minds of the patient.The treatment will start from the identification of the behavior which would entail a series of processes that can involve questioning, psychiatric evaluation and intense observation.

Treatments after evaluation and diagnosis:

Different experts have different approaches for treating sex addiction, but they all concur that they have to start with sex addiction counseling. Then supplemental treatments may be instituted. These may be provisional direction, behavioral intervention or resource provision. These supplemental treatments aim to assist the sex addict in his quest to overcome his sexual desires.

The counseling aims to eliminate the factors that trigger the sexual desires. Some areas that may be tackled are:

• Identification of the root causes,
• Marital or relationship problems,
• Work and other life-elated stresses.

Proper ways and avenues will be prescribed to re-direct the behavioral stress. In most cases, a program will be prescribed, along with the different steps to undergo in the process.

Recovery comes after treatment

This is an ongoing process for the reformed sex addict. Just because an addict has ceased his addiction does not gives surety that the process of recovery is over. The most important thing here is not to go back to the triggers so the recovering addict should never be exposed to these triggers wrong items. With the help of continuous therapy and counseling, the addict may find it easy to settle into new life and lead a normal life.

When you want to break porn addiction, you will be undergoing the same difficult withdrawal just like what smoking and drinking addicts do. When contemplating to stop, you have to consider the following:

• Why is it so hard to break porn addiction?
• What are the adverse effects of porn addiction?
• Where can you find help to break away from porn addiction?

Knowing the side effects of addiction to pornography helps in breaking away from it. It is also essential to understand what causes this addiction in you.

The triggers to porn addiction

As a human being, it is in your nature to have the overpowering drive for sex. It is very natural to have this feeling. For men, showing virility for sex is a sign of masculinity.Unlike in other kinds of addiction, pornography does not make use of drugs. When under this condition, your brain will release natural drugs in your system. You call these dopamine, serotonin and non-epinephrine, drugs that will incite your sex drive. These are the triggers to pornography.

The side effects of this kind of addiction will be the force that should compel you to quit porn addiction.

The negative effects – 8 reasons that should keep you away from porn

1. It has negative impact on your personality whereby you can have loss of confidence and self-esteem. You will feel that you have lost your masculine capability for sex if you are not aroused first by the porn materials.
2. Affected individuals may suffer desensitization, loss or reduced sensitivity. This will adversely affect your relationship with people around you.
3. This may indirectly cause you to commit crimes that involve sexual harassment. When you are a porn addict, your tendency is to watch the video or photos which will eventually arouse you. With the strong drive, you will try to find mate who can satisfy you. In the end, when none is found, you will be inclined to commit sexual crimes.
4. Pornography can also lead to masturbation and one-night stand sex. You can be inclined to use prostitutes to release your sexual desire. You will also be enticed to go to strip clubs to satisfy your addiction.
5. Addiction will increase your rong appetite for any other pornographic content, Thus you will spend so much time surfing the net for downloadable sex videos.
6. There is a tendency that you will lose sexual interest towards your spouse or partner because they could not replicate what you see in the porn videos.
7. Your addiction can ultimately lead to divorce, marital break-up or grave psychological problems. Why? You and your spouse will have a different outlook on sex.
8. There are those that will suffer regret and remorse because the pornographic acts are contra to their religious teachings and beliefs.

These are simple reasons why you should think to get off the hook of pornography. You know the causes and the side effects. But do you know how to break-away from it? When you have realized the ill-effects of porn addiction, you might want to amend your life. You can commence your new life free from sexual addiction via simple self-help.

Self-help tips

Keep yourself busy.
By keeping yourself busy, you will have no time to think about pornographic films, videos and photos. Concentrate on your job or studies. It is advised that you go out with your family and friends, meet new people and have fun. Do something that you like, probably sports or a hobby. A change in your lifestyle will help you forget pornography. Remove the downloaded files in your electronic gadgets and replace them with games or songs that will entertain you. By being busy, your mind will be diverted away from pornographic images.

Avoid temptations.
You probably have the internet as your source of porn materials. What you have to do is to filter the contents of your PC so that the porn materials will no longer reach you. One good precautionary measure is to have the filter installed by another person. This will prevent you from learning how to disable the filter.

Ensure a good relationship with people around you.
Try to renew your relationship with your family. Instead of looking at the materials, inculcate in your mind that your family is more important than those materials. Try to improve your intimacy with your spouse. You will eventually have less need for pornography for arousal. You will realize the true sexual pleasure from your relationship with your spouse.

There are other ways that can help you break away from addiction to pornography. Use whatever way is applicable to your need and capacity. Start a new, better and happier life.

Addiction to pornography

Addiction is a situation when a person could no longer control what he is doing, using or taking. An addiction may start as a hobby and when a person gets involved in the act regularly, it develops into addiction. An addict cannot control his use of the thing he is addicted to such that in the end he could no longer quit the addiction. This can happen with any porn addict who find it really difficult toquit porno addiction.

Pornography addiction is not a new thing. It had already existed in the past but the development and enhancement of technology has made pornography addiction reach high intensity. In the past, you witness this in movies, photos or magazines. Today, you can still find such magazines. But widespread availability of porn videos and movies has made it easy for people to access these materials on the internet. More and more people are using the internet to access this kind of material.

What you should know about pornography – shocking facts

• Pornography today is more prevalent. This is because pornographic materials and media can be easily accessed. The internet is a free source of videos and photos. With the electronic devices like tablets, notebooks and Smartphones, addiction has become more severe and addicts grow in number. This is because pornographic materials are more accessible anytime through gadgets that can just be kept in the bag or pocket.
• Pornographic materials are available in the internet such that people may no longer have to pay for the original and instead merely download them from the internet. Anyone with minimal technical skills can play the pornographic films and movies on computer. Storing then in the computer is easier compared to collecting volumes of pornographic magazines.
• You can easily detect or diagnose a person with porn addiction through the symptoms which includes 1) huge amount of time viewing pornography and 2) withdrawal from other activities in favor of porno viewing. The hoarding of videos already watched is another sign that a person is undergoing porn addiction. Possession of a few copies of the materials, magazines or DVDs is not yet alarming. However, voluminous copies which are viewed regularly become a problem.
• This condition can keep an addict away from the family. Addict’s children are not allowed to view the material. It may also have a negative impact on the spouse of an addict. As a result, addict’s relationship with the members of family is jeopardized.
• When a person become a sex addict who is now dependent on pornography to be aroused, an issue that may come between the married life of a person. The partner may have the feeling of being cheated, a feeling of just being used and not desired. There is a big difference between sex done by two parties with emotional attachment and sex done for a viewing audience.
• You know that pornography is hardly separated from sex. When aroused, the addict may not be able to contain himself such that sexual attacks may happen frequently. Could this be a cause of rise in crime against women and female children? You know the answer to this. You read and hear about rape cases.

Pornography addiction hasled to many problems – personal and community issues and crimes. Teenagers are affected most by this addiction. They are enticed by the different websites and are unconscious of the harmful effects of engagement in such activities. When addicted, it will be very hard to break away from this and in the end; it may completely ruin the life of an addict.

Some possible side effects of pornography addiction

• Involvement in sex-related crimes
• Relationship problem – with the family, friends and peers
• Attacks of anxiety
• Depression
• Lack of self-confidence or self-esteem
• Insomnia
• Lack of appetite
• Lack of sex drive without first viewing the porno material

Adverse effects of pornography addiction to the community

The effect on the community is more devastating. Statistics show that crimes involving sex have risen over the past decade. Many addicts turn prostitutes and call boys. More teens are getting addicted to pornography because of the current technology that makes pornographic viewing accessible anywhere and anytime.

These adverse effects are only very few but may already be more than enough to define the seriousness of the porn addiction problem. Once a person is hooked, it may be very difficult to quit porn addiction.

Porn addiction is described by behavioral experts as an ever present will to view pornographic content. Just like other kinds of addictions, such as drug addiction and alcohol addiction, porn addicts are almost driven to view pornographic content and go to great lengths to be able to watch it too. Where as in the past addicts had to carry out their desires in more physical forms of porn, i.e.  Magazines and CD’s, advances in technology and the advent of mobile devices and internet porn have opened up a whole lot of new options for addicts. This is perhaps the reason why porn continues to haunt all parts of society and has entered places where once it had no chance of penetration. Now, even normal people, ones that experts would not categorize as addicts, have also started to become attracted to porn. This has led to is an increase in the number of porn addicts, as all addicts take porn as more of a recreational activity.

Porn addiction is talked of in a negative tone because the effects that it has can literally tear lives apart. This article aims to single out these negative effects, as even though porn is touted as addiction that can ruin lives, its negative effects have not been discussed in detail at least the way they should be. Without further ado then, below are some of the effects that porn addiction can have on porn addicts:

Porn Addiction Destroys Relationships:

Porn addicts are known to suffer in relationships. Sitting in isolation all day long and viewing explicit content cuts off addicts from social contact. Therefore, these people find it hard to go out and meet friends, simply due to the fact that they do not get enough time as porn takes up most of their time. This leads to weakened relationships, which soon crumble. In addition, friends are not the only ones that addicts lose. An addict, who might be in a relationship with somebody, for instance, married to someone, will find it hard to enjoy sexual contact with his/her partner. The reason for this lack of enjoyment is the inability of the partner to carry out acts which are viewed on the screens. Thus, real sexual contact with a partner starts looking uninviting to addicts. Often, the loss of sexual interest in a partner leads to a loss of all kinds of interest in that partner, which more often than not spells disaster for the relationship. It is due to this reason that porn addiction had led to 56% of divorces.

Porn Addiction Hampers Addicts Financially:

While the internet has brought with itself a lot of free porn to be viewed, porn addicts have a knack of viewing paid content. In addition, a lot of pornographic websites market their offerings in such a way that people are naturally attracted to pay for the content. Paying for porn hampers addicts financially. Since porn addicts are not content with having only a few videos in their stash, they pile on paid content with the amount billed often ranging in the thousands range. An even more harrowing effect of porn, due to the lapse of internet security measures in work places, is that porn addicts view explicit content in their work places too. Imagine an addict with an office space that is removed from rest of the staff. The addict, sensing a chance to view explicit content, automatically opens a pornographic website on the browser. The lapse in security measures provides great help too, and since no body is looking, the addict continues to watch porn whenever possible.Since addicts cannot go without porn for long periods, this happens more often than not. Viewing porn during work hours leads to lowered productivity, and it is no wonder that addicts face job security issues.In fact, 1/3 of all companies have sacked an employee at some point due to the viewing of porn at work.

Porn Addiction Takes a Toll on the Health of Addicts:

In addition to causing major social and financial issues for addicts, porn addiction also damages the health of addicts. There are numerous reasons as to why this happens. Firstly, since addicts spend most of their time viewing porn in isolation, they destroy their social lives. A lack of interaction with people makes addicts lonely and depressed. Secondly, since porn affects addicts financially, the feeling of not being able to make ends meet makes individuals emotionally unstable. At its worst, porn addiction can also cause addicts to attempt suicide.

The negative effects of porn addiction are there for all to see, and with porn now more readily available than it was ever before, it is high time that the issue be looked at with major concern.

http://tinyurl.com/dxrwy23

Pornography obviously doesn’t just affect the person who is looking at pornography, but their significant other as well.

I would say that 90% of my clients struggling with porn addiction- are concerned about how porn is hurting their existing relationships. This article does a great job of describing the feelings of inadequacy and low self-esteem that the partner goes through when they discover pornography in their relationship.

If you are in a relationship and your partner doesn’t know about your pornography addiction, I would encourage you to open up to your partner about your struggles. Reassure them that is isn’t about them, and seek help. That’s why you are here. It is possible to beat this addiction.

I want to encourage you to not give up.

Ryan

There are hundreds of porn sites on the net and the temptation to visit them constantly can be overwhelming.  Many people start watching porn recreationally and find that eventually they simply cannot stop watching.  This is because of the effect it has on the chemicals in the brain.  Make no mistake about it porn is a just as much a drug as heroin or alcohol.

Viewing porn floods your brain with pleasure chemicals such as serotonin and dopamine.  Regular exposure to porn actually changes the way the brain is wired and the way it reacts to these chemicals and hormones.  In effect it rewires itself to cope with the large amount of these chemicals that are being produced each time porn is watched.  Over time a tolerance is built up which feeds the need for these pleasure chemicals and the brain demands more and more of them creating an addiction.

While masturbating is normal and healthy masturbating to excess definitely isn’t.  If it is interfering with your daily life and your relationships it is time to take action.  Addiction to porn and masturbation are commonly cited factors in divorce cases and frequently leads to depression and a loss of interest in actual sex.  Fortunately there is help available to help overcome an addiction to porn and a number of steps you can take yourself.

Counselling is widely available to people suffering from an addiction to pornography.  There are many websites that can provide help and advice as well as trained councillors and therapists.  An addiction of this type is absolutely nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about.  It is growing health problem for hundreds of thousands of men and women and one that should never be taken lightly.

The work of healing from your Addiction to Pornography can sometimes seem endless, like I have said before- with the right treatment there is hope even if you have had failures in the past, there is HOPE!!

Part of that hope comes from finding resources that continue to provide direction and insight to clients.

One resource that I have recently come across that has been extremely helpful to clients is a book called: Secret Keeping: Overcoming Hidden Habits and Addictions written by: John Howard Prin.

Although the content does not refer specifically to Pornography Addiction, the information is so helpful that clients are finding great hope in what they are reading in this book.

For example a client that I have been working with recently (John). His life was turned upside down recently when it was revealed to his wife that not only did he have an addiction to pornography he also had been having a long term affair and was frequently visiting strip clubs as well.

Due to some extreme external motivation John has dove into recovery, partly to save his marriage and family and also to save himself. He was the classic image management client who on the outside looked like he had everything together but behind the scenes he was self-destructing.

So when John came into my office he was definitely in a place where he was looking for answers and was willing to do the work. He was searching for answers to his behaviors and wanting to search within himself. Socrates once said, “the unexamined life is not worth living. Know thyself is the key to happiness.”

The importance of self examination in recovery is critical. I offered up the book Secret Keeping to John and he accepted to read it.

At our next session John was overwhelmed by the insight he gained from reading the book.  His wife also was able to read the book and was able to have a better understanding of the things her husband had done. He was finally at a place that John Prin the author of the book talks about where we: “Unburden yourself of those shameful and discreditable actions that you have intentionally concealed, and feel the freedom of it. Great risks bring great gains!”

John was letting go of his “image management” and facing his issues head on for the first time and as a result he was feeling more free than he ever had in his life. The opposite feeling to which our Addiction to Pornography will tell us we will feel, if we let people know about it.

The combination of effort and insight and willingness to face his fears is continuing to pay great dividens for John and will also do the same for you as you work to overcome your addiction to pornography.

In fighting YOUR Addiction to Pornography you must remember that there is another player involved in the battle that we need to pay attention to. That player is our Addictive Personality and it has a mind of it’s own.

In Dr. Lee Jampolsky’s book The Addictive Personality he states, “the Addictive Personality is not going to go down without a fight, and it is in your best interest to know all of its tricks and strategies for distraction.”

So we need to ask ourselves the questions – How does our Addictive Personality speak to us?

How does it try and keep us caught up in our addiction? Becoming familiar with it’s voice and with it’s lies is and essential tool in overcoming our addiction to pornography.

Here are some examples of the lies and strategies employed by our Addictive Personality:

• I failed before at this and will fail again.
• I can’t possibly do this.
• If I make a mistake it will ruin my whole life.
• I deserve to have one last time at this.
• This is not a big deal, my spouse is making this a bigger deal of this than it really is.
• You can stop this at any time that you want.
• If I just look at this magazine I won’t be looking at porn so that will be okay. (leads you to wanting more)

The list of lies can go on and on with our addictive personality, It will tells us whatever it wants us to hear in order to maintain the addiction in our lives. We need to recognize the voice and make it a personal goal to know as Dr. Jampolsky points out all of its tricks and strategies for distraction.

This will help us immensely in our ability to overcome our Addiction to Pornography.

Wishing you Much Success in your battle-

Ryan Wynder